I am one of life’s optimists. That’s not to say I don’t have my moments of self-doubt etc. but basically I have a positive outlook on life. Have you ever wondered how some people stay cheery, even when things in life are not going so well? I am going to share with you ten simple secrets of happy people to help you. This month we are going to explore my top five secrets!
1. Celebrate good times!
Happy people make every day a holiday! Just think for a moment and feel how excited you get when you are planning a vacation. When we are on holiday, whether exploring a new place, simply chilling out or doing something daring and out of our comfort zone-we are excited and we feel celebratory. Now, what if everyday could feel like that? Life can whiz by and we can get so bogged in the ‘day-to-day’ that we can feel as if life is leaving us behind. Choose to do something today that feels like a vacation. Even if it’s just stopping to have a cup of coffee-don’t walk around with the coffee in your hand-actually stop and relax, breathe deep, enjoy your coffee and watch the world go by. Taking only ten minutes to pause and celebrate life will lift your spirits. And who knows, it just might become a new habit!
And the world smiles with you. Have you ever seen a gray, sad face opposite you on the bus or beside you in a line-up and thought ‘gee, I’d like to be that person?’ No, I thought not. It’s a natural feeling to not want to be around people who look miserable. So if you decide to make yourself appear cheerful you’ll soon start to feel it, and then you’ll attract others who are cheerful. And the bonus here is that happy people have a natural inner glow and appear to look younger. Take a moment right now to check in the mirror: are you a naturally happy looking person? If not, decide to change that right now and start smiling!
3. Find a reason to laugh!
Seriously, haha! One thing that has been mentioned to me time and again by clients and colleagues over the years is that it doesn’t take long to be in my company and we end up laughing. Even when things are gloomy, and let’s face it we all have set-backs now and again-that’s life, you can look for the humor in situations. If this one is difficult for you, try detaching a little and look at your life as if it is a movie script. Or as my friend Dave used to say to me ‘I love getting updates on your life-you live in soap opera!’ Imagine a cinema audience watching your life-transfixed by your fate. You can even add a movie-trailer voice over for extra effect. You can’t help but giggle. And remember when you do this exercise that all the best movies have happy endings. Even if you are in the midst of what seems like hell, one of my tips is to go into the misery. ‘Have the best pity party in the world’-you’ll go so far over the top you’ll start laughing! And if all else fails, take a‘time-out’ and go watch an up-lifting movie or re-read a book that makes you feel good and forget about things for a while.
4. Think sexy!
Woohoo! Feeling sexy is a fantastic way to boost your happiness levels. All sorts of things go on with your hormones when you are feeling sexy-sex is an expression of feeling. So go ahead, think sexy thoughts and feel alive. And of course, orgasm is a great way of boosting tension-releasing estrogen and releasing endorphins that give a natural ‘high’. Feeling sexy is highly personal and subjective, so don’t obsess about it, just give yourself permission to feel like a sexy person. A tip here for those of you who have difficulty with this-think about a movie star who is at the top of their game and imagine what it would be like to be them or remember a time when you were feeling attractive, flirty and sexy. Then fake it ’til you make it!
5. Bounce back!
When I was a youngster there were these toys in England called ‘weebles’. They were pretty much egg-shaped creatures and they sang a little song ‘weebles wobble but they don’t fall down!’ When I get flattened by a brutal life experience I sing this little ditty to myself. It’s a natural part of life’s experiences to sometimes feel bad; the trick is to not stay down. Look for the good behind the bad. For example, I was having a whine about having to stay in the house from 1 to 5 today waiting for a repair man to arrive. This isn’t how I planned my day! However, the sun is shining and I’m now sitting with my lap-top on the deck writing my next article, with a nice cup of tea and some biscuits. Simple, really!
If it feels good, do it! I hope you find these tips useful and if you have any contributions to make please let me know and we’ll pass them along to others at SCT. Next month we’ll explore my other five secrets to happiness. In the meantime, keep well and do contact me for an appointment if you would like to explore your own inner happiness further. I am taking phone appointments Monday to Fridays now and would love to help. How may I be of contribution to your life?